Why couldn’t Bertrand Russell become a Christian? Pondering this question while reading his works, I gained some understanding of how biblical passages can be misinterpreted from an atheist’s perspective. He often selectively quoted Jesus’ words, analyzed them through a narrow lens, and used this as grounds to criticize Christianity as a whole. His critiques of the Catholic Church’s pomp and ceremony were particularly noticeable.

For example, he criticized Jesus’ act of cursing the barren fig tree to wither and die, arguing it was incomprehensible to rebuke a tree incapable of bearing fruit simply because it was out of season. Yet, the more I read, the more I saw emotions beyond the author’s perspective. Amidst the disappointment over the horrific massacres committed in the name of religion, or the tendency to dismiss the whole based on Bible passages he didn’t understand, I sensed, paradoxically, a longing for the ‘true church’ and a desire for someone to clearly explain the Bible.

Long ago, I once discussed the theory of reincarnation with a neighbor who was a Hindu. It was the belief that based on good or evil deeds, one would be reborn in the next life as a human of high status or as an animal or plant. At that time, I posed this question: “What good deed must a being become a worm through evil deeds perform to become human again?” I asked if such a being could truly be called a ‘worm’ if it performed the astonishing good deed of defying its instincts to share its gathered food with a friend, and whether such cases actually existed. I recall the lady couldn’t answer and said she would ask the teacher at the local center and let me know.

Recently, while talking with a college classmate, I learned he held religious views similar to ‘Scientology’. He claimed that transcendent extraterrestrial beings infused humans with spirit and imparted technology to develop civilization, and that the alternating infusion of that spirit into human and animal bodies is precisely what constitutes reincarnation. The hypothesis that angels in the Bible could be extraterrestrials, and the connection drawn between mental errors arising during evolution and the ‘Kluge’ concept, were also intriguing points. He built logical hypotheses denying God’s existence based on catastrophes like the Turkish earthquake or the world’s evil, yet I felt that even that logic was merely his own ‘belief’ lacking the premise that ‘my thinking could be wrong’.

Watching the Easter play last week, I was reminded anew of God’s justice, which demanded death for sinners, and His love revealed through His only Son, Jesus. Atheists may dismiss the resurrection as a symbol impossible to prove scientifically. Those who criticize Christianity with fragmented analysis and scientific standards, like Russell or my classmate, may be spiritually ignorant. Yet I ponder whether ‘spiritual’ is not the opposite of reason and science, but rather a realm that encompasses and transcends both.

Not long ago, my son and I underwent baptism, signifying the death of the old self and spiritual rebirth. While the act of being submerged in water and emerging might be scientifically just a simple motion, for me it was a **‘kairos moment’** imbued with eternal value. If aliens truly exist as my friend suggested, they might have already taken action against me after reading my blog, deeming me an impure being. But seeing as neither my Hindu neighbor nor any aliens have contacted me yet, I suppose I can relax for the time being.